Ash Ketchup Remembers Charizard/Transcript

Cilan: That reminds me Ash, didn't you say you had a flashback you wanted to tell us?

Ash: Oh yeah, you're right!

Iris: This one better be better than the story about the tacos...

Ash: Oh it is! This is a story from my early days as a trainer...back when I was just 10 years old...

Iris: Wait...you're still, 10 years ol-

Ash: It all began that beautiful stormy night...We were running like cloaked ninjas in the night, when suddenly! We came across a poor little Charmander that was being cyber-bullied by birds! We scared them off, but the little guy really needed medical attention!

Brock: This little guy really needs medical attention!

Ash: Don't worry Charmander! Nurse Joy will put that fire out soon...When we got there, we soon discovered it was abandoned by its trainer, and left ther-

N: Everyday...Over 156 Charmanders are abandoned by their trainers...But it doesn't have to be this way...Call today, to donate, so we can end this cruelty once and f-

Ash: Interrupt me with a shitty commercial again, and I'll stuff Pokébeef down your throat. ¿Comprende?

N: Fine...

Ash: Well anyways, after his boo-boos and traumatic head injury were healed, he decided to set off on his journey to become a Pokémon master! Unfortunately, he ran into his ex, and let's just say he wasn't too thrilled by the idea...

Damian: Master says get in the ball!

Ash: Charmander deserves better than this submissive relationship!

Damian: Let's smash, shall we?

Ash: In the end, Charmander did smash him, just not in the way he wanted.

Damian: Oh f**k me dead!!!!

Ash: Welcome to the team!

Charmander: Charr!!

Ash: And just like that, Charmander joined the team!

Cilan: I...is the story done?

Ash: No.

Cilan: Then why'd you sto-

Ash: Why'd you interrupt me?! Well then I got turned into a Primeape...that was fun! Unfortunately, one of my clones decided to show up. I don't really like him. He doesn't wear a hat and his voice is so weird...

Clone Ash: Alright Charmander! KICK HIS ASH!

Ash: That's when puberty hit...

Charmander: Char...

Charmeleon: Charmeleon!

Ash: Congrats buddy! He was never the same after evolving in the Charmelon...

Iris: Don't you mean Charmeleon?

Ash: Oh right, like you should believe Unova girl over the guy from Kanto! Anyways, never wanted to obey, and our relationship got really heated.

Cilan: Sounds like you didn't have a badge high enough for Charmeleon to obey you!

Ash: OH that must have been it! Cause at the time I had just beaten Koga, so uh...no wonder.

Cilan: Wait...like, the Elite Four member?

Ash: Yep! He even gave me a box of Koga-Kola as a prize. Talk about food poisoning!

Iris: Ash, focus!

Ash: The next part is really happy though! AUUUUUUUUUUUGHHH!

Aerodactyl: That'll teach you to not make Jurassic Park jokes around me!

Ash: Suddenly! Charizard appeared out of no where!

Iris: So Charmeleon evolved?

Ash: Ha! Don't be stupid! Don't you think it's more logical that turn Charmelon decided to run away, and a random Charizard with no emotional connection to me decided to conveniently show up and save me at the very same coincidental moment?

Iris: Okay...now I know you're playing me...

Ash: Now if there's one thing Charizard had, it was badass!

Charizard: *GROWL*

Ash: There was just one problem...He was lazy. Like, fall asleep during the Pokémon League lazy.

Cilan: In other words badge obedience levels are bullshit...

Ash: Please Charizard! I'll even give you a deep tissue massage!! Isn't this romantic?

N: I too am a very proud Pokémon masseur. It's a great profession!

Ash: And a great way to relieve stress!

Iris: Oh, you mean like a time you had me massage your-

Cilan: Ooookayy, let's just finish the story!

Ash: Okay, but I gotta warn you, this next part will really hit you in the feels...*Ah-ahem...* Who wants a weak Charizard anyways? Text me when you get a chance!!!

Misty: Ash, hold on!

Brock: Ash, wait up!

Cilan: So in the end you just turned into Damian?

Ash: I guess so, but it was the right thing to do, right Pikachu?

Pikachu: If you ever ditch me, I'M gonna tell Bianca where you are!

Ash: B...B...Bianca?!?!

Bianca: Hi Ash! You're looking, VERY DRY TODAY!

Ash: Aughhh! AUUUUUUUGHH! WAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUGHHHH! Friends forever?

Pikachu: Mmhmm!

Outro: ♪ OH OH, WE BELONG TOGETHER! IT'S ALWAYS YOU AND MEEEEE...POKéMON! ♪

Clone Ash: Victory screech!

All: LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA!